Sage Woman Chronicles

I’m in a Critique Group. Now What?

Revised book cover for The Space Between Time

“If you’re going to say what you want to say, you’re going to hear what you don’t want to hear.” ~ Roberto Bolaño, The Insufferable Gaucho

“People will react to you as a result of their own mindset, rather than as a reflection of your worth. Most people use others as mirrors for their own darkness. If you have been hurt by such people, perhaps you can use these experiences to become a different kind of person – one who reflects the light within others instead of using them as mirrors. Maybe your experiences of pain can lead you to being a great leader, someone who lights up the world. Your most painful struggle is ripe with opportunity.” ~ Vironika Tugaleva

Earlier this year I joined the Women’s Fiction Writer’s Association and yesterday my request for joining a critique group was granted. I’ve not met these women in person. We’ve begun to communicate via email and so far I’m encouraged. I hope these women will offer helpful comments on my work. I’m excited to see what happens.

One of the most vulnerable things artists can do is receive feedback on their work. It’s a necessary part of the artistic process, but it can feel like you’re standing in front of a group with no clothes on. Part of that feeling is because often the criticism hurts. If you’re lucky, the group doesn’t want to hurt your feelings, they just want to help you improve your work. Of course, there are those who just love to watch the poison spread as they tear your work apart. We’ve all met those kinds of people. They’re hard to deal with, but it’s important to speak up and not take their abuse.

As someone who has to give feedback as a director and to student actors, I see the situation from both sides. When I’m working with my students on their scenes, I tell them what they did well first. Then I give them the “Here’s what you could do better,” comments, and finally I give them more positive feedback. Often I offer up a bunch of suggestions among the improvement comments. I let them know that since they are playing the part, they need to decide why their character is saying and doing what they are doing. I think that helps them feel like they have some control over their performance instead of me telling them exactly how to do it. In almost every class, as in any critique group, there is always that one person who doesn’t want to take any suggestions. They think they know everything there is to know about their character or story. In those situations, I just keep my mouth shut because they aren’t open to learning anything new..

When I am on the receiving end of criticism, I try to remember that, for the most part, what my partners say will be helpful and give me ideas for improving my work. I’m tempted to have the attitude that no one knows my work better than I do, but the reality is, I don’t know how what I’ve written comes across. That’s what I want from my critique partners. I want them to tell me where the story bogs down, or where I go off on an unnecessary tangent. I want them to point out parts of the story where they were confused, where I left out vital information, or gave too much away too soon.

Unlike theatre, writing is a solitary endeavor. I love the collaboration of doing a play, but when it comes to writing, I prefer to work alone until the first draft of my manuscript is finished. I thought seriously before I asked to be put into a critique group for that reason. But I don’t want to take seven years to finish this second novel, so I decided to get help earlier in the process.

Another reason I wanted to join a group was to gain more exposure. If I’m going to be a member of a writer’s organization, I might as well get acquainted with some of the members. This seemed like a good way to do that.

I do, of course, have a couple of writer friends near by who are also willing to help, so if it turns out that this new group doesn’t work out, I’ve got a back up plan. I’m keeping my fingers crossed.

Thanks for reading. I appreciate your likes and comments.

Lucinda is the author of The Space Between Time, a historical, time-travel, magical realism, women’s novel. It’s available in all ebook formats at Smashwords, and print-on-demand at Amazon and other fine book sellers. To join her email list, click here. She will never sell the names on her list.

Let’s Make Friends With the World!

“If I can’t impact people then this whole thing is a waste.” ~ Chris Rosati

Barry and I are avid fans of Steve Hartman’s segments on CBS Sunday Morning. A couple of weeks ago he had a tribute to Chris Rosati, a man Steve had profiled first in 2013 with subsequent updates. Chris lived in Durham, North Carolina and had ALS. He said that before he left this world, he wanted to make as many people happy as he could. His first plan to accomplish this was to steal a Krispy Kreme donut truck so he could give away donuts to cancer patients, and to children at local schools.

Somehow Steve found out about Chris’s plan and scheduled an interview. As Steve said in the initial interview, “This plan has some holes in it, and I’m not talking donuts,” to which Chris replied, “One of the blessings of ALS is what are they gonna do?” Chris admitted that his plan was wacky but he told Steve what he really wanted to do was change the world by making people happy.

Of course, when Steve’s story broke, Krispy Kreme gave Chris and his wife an entire bus load of donuts to share with as many people as he could. His good deeds didn’t end there. His smile and generous nature inspired people and especially children all over the country to do random acts of kindness. He had them make videos about their good deeds and then held a red carpet premiere of the videos. After that he came up with the idea of “Butterfly Grants” to help children fund their good deed projects.

Chris died earlier this month. When Steve asked Chris’ daughter what she’d remember most about her dad, she said she was proud of him because he tried to do something hard, he tried to make friends with the world.

It is sometimes hard to make friends with the world. Yet it’s people like Chris Rosati, who remind me that every little act of kindness, especially in the face of so many struggles, does make the world a better place and I shouldn’t stop doing it.

The thing is, I often get caught up in my old ways of thinking and start to assign blame, or I panic about things that I won’t even remember happened in a few months time. Yet I’m grateful that when I go into panic mode, something happens to remind me to take a deep breath, turn my thinking around, and trust that I’m taken care of no matter what.

Today as I was writing this post, something happened that brought up a lot of fear and panic. But I was writing about Chris Rosati and my little problem seemed so trivial and temporary compared to the challenges he faced. I’m sure he had bad days when he wondered why he was going to die too young, but he chose to help others rather than wallow.

So, in honor of Chris’s determination to change the world, I’m going to let go of my panic and feel good that, so far, I have had a really great life. I mean what can be better than being able to help and inspire people?

Thanks for reading. I appreciate your likes and comments.

Let’s Chill Out!

“Our culture encourages us to plan every moment and fill our schedules with one activity and obligation after the next, with no time to just be. But the human body and mind require downtime to rejuvenate. I have found my greatest moments of joy and peace just sitting in silence, and then I take that joy and peace with me out into the world.” ~ Holly Mosier

“Your mind will answer most questions if you learn to relax and wait for the answer.” ~ William S. Burroughs

“Stop a minute, right where you are. Relax your shoulders, shake your head and spine like a dog shaking off cold water. Tell that imperious voice in your head to be still.” ~ Barbara Kingsolver

This morning at 7:00 a.m., on the day I’m writing this, I got a ding on my phone. I wasn’t even out of bed yet, because my husband doesn’t work on Fridays and it’s a sleep in day. It was a long Facebook message about Social Security and how I needed to pass this along so that we can protect Social Security … etc., etc., etc. I ignored the message knowing that things may look dire, but I believe I live in a friendly universe, so no matter what, I’m going to be all right. Some people may think I’m delusional. That’s okay. I just see the world differently than they do.

One of the privileges of growing older is the fact that I’ve seen and experienced a lot of stuff. When I was younger I used to get upset when things seemed to go wrong. I’d bend myself out of shape, and make myself sick with what I THOUGHT was going to happen. As it turned out most of the time, what I had imagined never came to pass. I had made myself sick for nothing.

So now I know that, first, nothing is good or bad except thinking makes it so, to paraphrase Shakespeare. And second, especially where governments are concerned, nothing happens over night. They may pass bills to gut Social Security, or take away our health care, or yada, yada, yada, but none of that is going to happen tomorrow. AND there are always people whose purpose it is to safeguard our rights and I can rely on them to prevail.

Over the last few months, I’ve withdrawn from groups on Facebook and other social media that continually post dire warnings. I do this because I don’t see the world the same way they do and I don’t need their negative energy clinging to me throughout the day.

Don’t get me wrong, I will stand up for people in my daily life when they need it, but I’m not going to waste my time ranting and raving about the big stuff that happens, because I am thoroughly convinced that change happens from the ground up. Each individual who chooses to chill out, to get a new perspective, to go with the flow, or even point out inequities, helps us create a friendlier, more stress free environment a little bit at a time.

I think there is an ebb and flow to history. We happen to be in a time when there is a great deal of turmoil. But if you look back at what has happened in the past, it’s often those times, when people with differing ideas clash and cause the most innovative advancements to happen.

Here’s an example. I’m reading a novel right now that takes place in 1150. The church had tight control on almost every aspect of life. One of the characters in my book builds a paper mill. That may not seem like such a big thing, but in 1150, most people did not read, so the church controlled information by telling people what to think. With the advent of readily available inexpensive paper, more people began to have the opportunity to learn to read and write, and not pay the church scribes to create their documents, and make copies of or write important books. Of course, the church did not want this to happen and took drastic measures to retain their control on the flow of information. The creation of inexpensive paper did lead, eventually, to the invention of the printing press. That broke the stranglehold the church held on education and the flow of information. Boy, have things changed since then. Now almost everyone can not only read and write, but the entire world is connected by the media and the most ordinary person can express their opinion for the world to read.

There was a great deal of struggle involved to get us to where we are now. Lots of people died in that struggle, but would you want to go back to having the church control information? I don’t think so. As a result, I thank those who volunteered to push for change both then and now.

Having written all of the above, life is a mystery to me. I don’t know why I’m living a happy fulfilling life, while millions of people are stuck in refugee camps, or live under oppressive regime’s, or on the streets. What I do know is that we each have our part to play, and it seems to me that mine has to do with spreading as much joy as I can.

I know that in the long run if a situation looks really bad, it’s just not worth getting upset about. I’ll do what I can to help, of course, but most of the time, as my dad used to say, “In a hundred years, it won’t make any difference.” And the things that we will remember one hundred years from now will be worth the sacrifice.

Thanks for reading. I appreciate your likes and comments.

To Do a Shakespeare Play or Not To Do a Shakespeare Play

“The history of men’s opposition to women’s emancipation is more interesting perhaps than the story of that emancipation itself.” ~ Virginia Woolf, A Room of One’s Own

“If men could see us as we really are, they would be a little amazed; but the cleverest, the acutest men are often under an illusion about women; they do not read them in a true light: they misapprehend them, both for good and evil: their good woman is a queer thing, half doll, half angel; their bad woman almost always a fiend.” ~ Charlotte Brontë, Shirley

For quite some time I have had a slow burn on about misogyny. The research I’ve been doing for my second book has fueled some of my anger. My protagonist in the past is a member of the suffrage movement, and the one in the present is caught up in events much like the ones going on today. This project has made me acutely aware of how women have been misunderstood and mistreated over the centuries. If you’ve been reading these posts, you’ll recognize a theme.

When I’m not writing, I’m teaching theatre classes and one of those classes offered by the college each semester is a performance class. I don’t always get students to sign up for it because we have a relatively small population at the local campus, and five other campuses spread around our large county, and beyond. With my focus so much on women’s rights, lately, I’ve been thinking about doing Shakespeare’s Measure for Measure. Which means I’ll have to begin right now doing a lot of recruiting because doing Shakespeare is quite a challenge.

Measure for Measure is about how a seemingly pious and upright man, Angelo, shows his true nature when given absolute power. In the play, the city of Vienna is ruled by a Duke. The laws are harsh, especially when it comes to relationships between men and women. Sexual offenses are supposed to be strictly, and harshly enforced, but the Duke, for reasons we never discover, has not done this. At the beginning of the play he decides to turn over his duties and authority to his second in command so he can take a trip to Poland, which, of course, he doesn’t do. He pretends to be a friar to observe what happens in his absence. Right away, power goes to Angelo’s head and he imprisons upstanding citizens, except for the fact that they have engaged in sex outside of marriage. The most prominent of these is Claudio, Isabella’s brother, and his betrothed, Juliet. When Isabella, who is about to take her final vows to become a nun, leaves the convent to plead for her brother’s life, Angelo is so taken with her innocence, devotion to her brother, her caring, and devout nature, that he finds himself lusting after her. It’s as if he wants to claim her pure goodness by defiling it.

To modern audiences the central problem of sex outside of marriage which drives the true theme of the play, seems inconsequential and even silly. However, during Shakespeare’s time the laws of the church were taken very seriously. Sex was, and still is, considered original sin and is reserved for married couples alone. You can see why Shakespeare may have used this as a jumping off point for the play. Love and lust are sometimes confused. And there are men who will risk their reputations to take possession of a woman they desire as if by doing so, he can absorb the qualities he admires in her.

When Isabella comes a second time to get Angelo’s answer about her brother, Angelo at first suggests, and then demands that to save her brother’s life, she must sleep with him. It’s the kind of situation women from the beginning of time have found themselves in. From Isabella’s point of view, she would be committing a mortal sin and damning her immortal soul. She’d gladly give her physical life for her brother, but does not want to give up her soul.

In a modern context, Isabella might not lose her soul, but she would lose things just as precious, her sense of self and safety, and her peace of mind. She would carry the degradation of giving into a man like Angelo with her for the rest of her life.

Fortunately the Duke is there to save both Isabella and Claudio, and expose Angelo for the fraud he is. The implication is that this was the Duke’s intention all along.

With the current attacks on women from federal, state, and local governments, as well as the ones from powerful men, this seems like the time to revive this play, or at the very least, adapt it for a modern audience. So, though I’ve been going back and forth about whether or not to direct it, writing this post has pretty much made up my mind to do it. Besides, it’s always a good idea to go back and learn something from Shakespeare.

Thanks for reading. I appreciate your likes and comments.

Some of My Favorite Things

“People who lack the clarity, courage, or determination to follow their own dreams will often find ways to discourage yours. Live your truth and don’t EVER stop!” ~ Steve Maraboli

“There was a definite process by which one made people into friends; it involved talking to them and listening to them for hours at a time.” ~ Rebecca West

I have never written a blog post enumerating some of my favorite things even though there have been times when I’ve written reviews of books and movies I liked. Today I want to share some things I like, from television shows, to podcasts, to my new morning ritual. I hope you enjoy.

First favorite thing: I have a new pre-writing ritual. It’s this week’s assignment from Art & Soul Reloaded. I’ve never had a set ritual before sitting down to write, so coming up with something to summon the muses has been fun. I tend to over think these little assignments Pam Grout gives us every week. This time I decided not to do that and just choose some things to do that satisfy me right now. I can always refresh my ritual later.

I have two current favorite songs that I listen to often. The first is “Happy” by Pharrell Williams. He has a series of one hour YouTube videos made at different times of the day in different locations. He sings the song and dances to it the first time through and then each successive time through different people dance to his sound track. I’m not a good dancer, but I do dance to this song. It’s a good way to get my blood flowing in the morning and to remind myself that I can choose to be happy no matter what is going on. For me it’s better to write from a happy place rather than from self-torture.

The second song I love is “Evermore” from Beauty and the Beast. The composer wrote it especially for this new live action version of the movie. The Beast sings it after realizing that he has fallen in love with Belle as she is riding away to save her father from Gaston. In the song he sings, “Now I know she’ll never leave me, even as she fades from view, she will still inspire me, be a part of everything I do …” That touches me so deeply because we do need each other more than we realize. And those we love are still inspiring and supporting us even if they’re gone. So, as I sit down to write, I remember that I’m not writing alone. My ideas come from everything that has happened to me, and all the love I’ve shared. That gives me the courage to try to put into words the feelings and ideas that rattle around in my head.

Second favorite thing: I’ve never been a fan of listening to podcasts on a regular basis. My husband has several that he listens to on his way to and from work. I prefer silence when I’m driving, but a few months ago one of my Goodreads friends suggested I try Anne Bogel’s “What Do I Read Next” podcast and her blog, Modern Mrs. Darcy. After listening to an episode, I was hooked. Anne talks to regular everyday readers, who as it turns out, aren’t ordinary at all. Like the woman who owns, CW Pencil Enterprise – Purveyors of Superior Graphite. Who would have thought that someone could maintain a thriving business selling pencils, and all the accouterments that go with them? Even though this woman was a guest because of the books she loves, we got to hear enough of her story that I want to travel to New York just to visit her store. (Don’t despair, if you can’t travel to New York, she does have an online store.) Or another guest owns a bookstore devoted entirely to books about food. She sells a good number of cookbooks, naturally, but she also carries novels that center around food, or books about celebrations involving food. She even hosts book and food related events in her store. These are creative, interesting women I never would have known about if not for Anne Bogel’s podcast. I love it when people follow their passion and the universe rises up to meet them.

My third favorite thing is the television station NATGEO. When I was younger I was a television addict. I’d sit down with the TV Guide and plan out what I was going to watch during the coming week. In recent years, Barry and I have paired down our television watching and looked for unusual and informative shows rather than the same old sitcoms, or scripted dramas. Earlier this year NATGEO ran their first scripted series, Genius directed by Ron Howard. This first season was about Albert Einstein. It was fascinating. I didn’t know much about Einstein’s early life, his struggles to get his ideas published, his turbulent first marriage, or how he and his second wife eventually emigrated to the United States. It was riveting television, and I learned a great deal about physics in the process. The next season of Genius is going to be about Pablo Picasso. I’m looking forward to that one.

Another series on NATGEO I love is The Story of … with Morgan Freeman. Last year’s series was The Story of God, this season it’s The Story of Us. Morgan Freeman is on a mission, with both series, to help us understand each other better. I have found each episode compelling and even life changing, as he travels around the world asking questions and meeting people with extraordinary stories to tell. I hope you’ll check out both of these shows.

I have other favorites which I may share in future podcasts but until then, have a great weekend.

Thanks for reading. I appreciate your likes and comments.