Those Lovely Intangibles

This post contains affiliate links.

“Look, Doris, someday you’re going to find that your way of facing this realistic world just doesn’t work. And when you do, don’t overlook those lovely intangibles. You’ll discover they’re the only things that are worthwhile.” Fred Gailey in Miracle on 34th Street

We live in a materialistic world. It appears that the things we value most are things we can touch, taste, and see. For example, our house and furnishings, car, clothes, jewelry, expensive vacations and the like. But what if those things were not worth as much as things like, kindness, compassion, love, joy, connection, and all the other things that aren’t considered very important because they “don’t put food on the table.” 

Having a roof over one’s head and putting food on the table are important for all of us, but what happens if that’s all we provide our families? I don’t remember the context but I was talking with a teacher who said she asked her elementary school students to write about what their families did at dinner time or what their evening activities were like. She was appalled when several of her students wrote that they went home to their rooms did their homework, and played games on their computers, got their dinners and went back up to their rooms and watched their favorite TV show, or continued to play games until bed time. There seemed to be very little family interaction. If that’s the case in a lot of families, no wonder there are so many depressed and angry people in the world.

Human beings are emotional creatures. We need to be nurtured with love, kindness, and understanding. We need to practice conversing with others learning to share our opinions and listen to others share theirs. Relationships are probably the most important thing that sustains us. If we don’t have a support system our lives can be extremely bleak. We can’t really get human connection by watching TV, listening to music, podcasts, or watching YouTube videos. Being in the room with another human being, and even touching them from time to time is vital to our physical health. We only have to look at the news to see the tragedies caused by lack of human connection.

I was at the doctor this week for a physical and she asked me if I had a support system. She wanted to know if I had people I could talk to if something emotional happened to me. I told her I do, though they don’t all live here. And as I was driving home, I remembered a study I read someplace, maybe Psychology Today, that said that we only need a small circle of close friends and or family as our trusted support system to remain healthy. I’m fortunate to have that. 

Living on this planet is difficult but having healthy relationships helps us navigate the tough times. How do we create healthy relationships? That’s one of the questions I ask myself all the time. As a teacher, I suggested that we could learn the good and not so good aspects of relationships by analyzing stories and then applying what we’d learned out in the real world. But I’m not sure I ever emphasized that being vulnerable is part of creating great relationships. And yet, I was teaching acting. That’s one of the most vulnerable things a person can do, try to understand and portray a character. It’s risky to be vulnerable. We’re taught not to show our true emotions to others because if we do, we’ll probably be thought of as weak. Maybe that’s why actors are often not respected as much as lawyers, doctors, bankers, CEO’s of big businesses or politicians. An actor’s job is to be vulnerable and dig deep into the emotional lives of the characters they play. I have learned to value their work because I’ve learned so much from what they’ve shown me about myself and my fellow human beings.

I’ve written all this to state that I have been struggling with the fact that what I do in my business is not tangible. Everything I do is about the ideas and emotional experiences shared in stories by the writers and sometimes demonstrated by actors. I use what happens to the characters in the stories I consume to examine my own life. Since I was a little girl, I have felt that part of my purpose was to learn to love myself, so I could pass on that love to others. But for the most part, I’ve not been paid a whole lot of money for that. And I have asked myself, does that matter? It would be nice to make a lot of money, yet, what is success? Increasingly my answer is, I’ll be successful if I can help others improve their relationships. If the people I touch with this blog, my podcast, and online course learn to acknowledge and manage their emotions, become vulnerable and build deep and loving relationships, then I’ve accomplished my goals. 

I’ve also realized that striving for the most toys isn’t really success at all. As the title of a famous classic movie states, You Can’t Take it With You. But we can take all the love and connections with us. Those lovely intangibles stay with us forever.

Here’s to sharing some lovely intangibles this weekend with your friends and family.

Blessings,

Lucinda Sage-Midgorden © 2023

Saving the World One Story at a Time

Special Coupon Code for May

Analyzing stories gives us CRITICAL DISTANCE from things that have happened to us. That’s why I’m hooked on stories. I get to examine my own life by watching the characters go through their emotional ups and downs. If that sounds like something you’d like to try, you might want to consider taking my course Saving the World One Story at a Time. Special May discount at: https://lnkd.in/gBp4hm4H

Patreon

I’m so passionate about stories that I created the Story-Power podcast and Patreon communities so I’d have an excuse to talk story with other story lovers. If you’re passionate about stories too, and want to talk about what you’ve learned from your favorites, come join me at patreon.com/StoryPower.

The Space Between Time

Lucinda is the author of The Space Between Time, an award finalist in the “Fiction: Fantasy” category of the 2017 Best Book Awards.

Have you ever experienced life shattering events? Yeah, after the last few years, most of us have. In The Space Between Time, Jenna Holden gets slammed by her fiancé walking out, her mother’s untimely death, and losing her job all in one week. But she receives unexpected help when she finds her three-times great-grandmother’s journals and begins the adventure of a lifetime.

The Space Between Time is available in all ebook formats at Smashwords and for Kindle at Amazon, or you can find the ebook at iBooks or Barnes and Noble. If you prefer a physical copy, you can find a print-on-demand version at Amazon. Stay tuned for news when the audiobook version is published.

Lucinda is also the host of Story-Power a podcast where she and her guests discuss their creative endeavors, and/or the stories that have changed their lives. It’s available here on Sage Woman Chronicles and on Apple, Google, and Spotify podcast apps. Please rate and leave a review. It helps people find me.

PodMatch

If you are a podcaster, or have a message or fantastic product you want to share with the world, I encourage you to check out PodMatch. Use the affiliate link and tell them, Lucinda sent you. Then contact me so we can set up a Story-Power chat.

Stories: Not Just for Entertainment

This post contains affiliate links.

“We’re not on our journey to save the world but to save ourselves. But in doing that you save the world. The influence of a vital person vitalizes.” ~ Joseph Campbell

“Stories are memory aids, instruction manuals and moral compasses.” ~ Aleks Krotoski, author, broadcaster, journalist and social psychologist

I’m a huge story nerd. If you’ve been reading this blog for any length of time, you know that. And yet, I’m not sure I ever wrote a post about why I became a story nerd and what I’ve learned from analyzing stories.

It all started when I was a child. My parents instituted movie night. Don’t blame my parents for not reading to us. My mom worked and was tired at the end of the day. My dad had dyslexia which made it hard for him to read out loud. But they were big on education and wanted us to learn about how to get along with the people around us, so … family movie night.

We didn’t just watch the movie and say, “Wow! That was a great movie.” Nope, we sat and discussed the movie during commercial breaks and after the movie was over. My dad would ask lots of questions about which characters we liked and why. We’d ask questions about why the characters acted as they did. And in the end we’d talk about what the story meant to us.

Of course as we grew we learned to pay attention to things like body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice, as well as the lines, to get clues about what the characters were really thinking and feeling. Unless you’ve taken a communication class, you might not realize that listening is a huge part of good communication. And paying attention to non-verbal cues is part of listening. 

Have you noticed that sometimes what a person says doesn’t match their body language? When that happens, it doesn’t necessarily mean the person is lying. But it is a clue that maybe there is more to the story than they are telling. Or maybe they think they’re telling the truth, because they haven’t figured out their emotional stuff quite yet. That kind of situation just let’s me know to continue to pay attention, and ask more questions.

I didn’t realize it as I was growing up, but I was learning other vital things that makes interacting with those around me more understandable, and even sometimes more graceful. Once I started studying theatre, though, I began to understand that analyzing every little detail of a character’s experiences, emotions, and actions in a play was allowing me to hone my critical thinking skills and the complexities of human behavior and emotions. Much later I understood that I was deepening my ability to be compassionate, empathetic, and to develop emotional intelligence. 

I’m telling you this short version of what I’ve learned from stories because I’m concerned about the trend in education and the media to tout the S.T.E.M. (Science, Technology, Engineering, and Math) disciplines as the end all and be all to save the world. NOPE! The arts teach us how to understand our emotions and each other much better than solving mathematical proofs does. Don’t get me wrong. S.T.E.M. is important, but what good is it to go to the Moon if we can’t get along with each other once we get there? 

There have been lots of studies about how taking classes in the arts are highly beneficial. Here are 10 things we can learn from the arts: 1) Creativity, 2) Confidence, 3) Problem Solving, 4) Perseverance, 5) Focus, 6) Non-verbal Communication, 7) Receiving Constructive Feedback, 8) Collaboration, 9) Dedication, 10) Accountability.

I can honestly say that I’ve seen students who were terrified to perform in front of the class at the beginning of a semester, blossom and be able to perform without fear by the end. One student even told me that being in my acting class helped him feel more confident when he had to give presentations for other classes, or at work. I particularly like #8, collaboration. If we all developed that skill, wouldn’t the world be a much happier place in which to live?

I wrote all of that to explain why I created my online class, Saving the World One Story at a Time. Stories are not only a fun way to learn, but they give us a bit of distance from our own problems and maybe even help us see ways to solve them without having to go through long and painful self-examination. The writer and characters do part of the work for us.

From time-to-time, I will probably give suggestions of stories I’ve learned a vital lesson from. I hope you will take the time to share one or two with us as well.

I hope you are enjoying the changing seasons.

Blessings,

Lucinda Sage-Midgorden © 2023  

Saving the World One Story at a Time

The world is in such chaos right now that sometimes we need to get a perspective on what’s happening. I designed this course on Ûdemy for people who are looking for a way to get a better understanding about what it means to be a human being. Stories are one great way to walk in the shoes of the characters, connect with them emotionally and learn from their mistakes. Then taking what you’ve learned and use it out in the real world. It’s learning in a fun way! If that sounds like something you’d be interested in, I hope to see you in class.

Patreon

I’m so passionate about stories that I created the Story-Power podcast and Patreon communities so I’d have an excuse to talk story with other story lovers. If you’re passionate about stories too, and want to talk about what you’ve learned from your favorites, come join me at patreon.com/StoryPower.

PodMatch

If you are a podcaster, or have a message or fantastic product you want to share with the world, I encourage you to check out PodMatch. Use the affiliate link and tell them, Lucinda sent you. Then contact me so we can set up a Story-Power chat.

The Space Between Time

Lucinda is the author of The Space Between Time, an award finalist in the “Fiction: Fantasy” category of the 2017 Best Book Awards.

Have you ever experienced life shattering events? Yeah, after the last few years, most of us have. In The Space Between Time, Jenna Holden gets slammed by her fiancé walking out, her mother’s untimely death, and losing her job all in one week. But she receives unexpected help when she finds her three-times great-grandmother’s journals and begins the adventure of a lifetime.

The Space Between Time is available in all ebook formats at Smashwords and for Kindle at Amazon, or you can find the ebook at iBooks or Barnes and Noble. If you prefer a physical copy, you can find a print-on-demand version at Amazon. Stay tuned for news when the audiobook version is published.

Lucinda is also the host of Story-Power a podcast where she and her guests discuss their creative endeavors, and/or the stories that have changed their lives. It’s available here on Sage Woman Chronicles and on Apple, Google, and Spotify podcast apps. Please rate and leave a review. It helps people find me.

Creativity is Wisdom

This post contains affiliate links

“Humans are not ideally set up to understand logic; they are ideally set up to understand stories.” Roger C. Schank, Cognitive Scientist

I am an Austrian-Californian multimedia Artist, educator, author of 5 art-related books, podcaster, coach, creative advisor and former Newport Beach CA arts commissioner. Fluent in German and English.

I’m an outside the box thinker, who is a passionate creativity/awareness researcher that looks for true values of humanity outside of any man-made system. I have discovered a paradox: 95% of worldwide artists are existing around the poverty level, but they love to create so much they are proud to be poor. But without creativity there are no man-made systems, there would be no world as we know it. 

The solution: I discover patterns within Art that foster creative communication and identify art values outside any systems which always raise our human potential.

Michaell  MICHAELLM.com #TheSmartofArt

https://michaellm.com/self-aware-art-education

Contact Michaell on Facebook, LinkedIn, Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, Pinterest

PodMatch

This episode is brought to you by PodMatch, the dating service for podcasters. They introduced me to Michaell Magruche, and I’m so glad they did. I hope you’ve enjoyed our conversation and remember that if you have a podcast or something to share with the world, check out PodMatch at my affiliate link at PodMatch and tell them Lucinda sent you.

Patreon

I’m so passionate about stories that I created the Story-Power podcast and Patreon communities so I’d have an excuse to talk story with other story lovers. If you’re passionate about stories too, and want to talk about what you’ve learned from your favorites, come join me at patreon.com/StoryPower.

Fear is Killing Us!

“The Lord is my light and my salvation – whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life – of whom shall I be afraid?” ~ Psalm 27:1

“Fear is the path to the Dark Side. Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering.” ~ Yoda in Star Wars

“He who is not every day conquering some fear has not learned the secret of life.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. The fearful are caught as often as the bold.” ~ Helen Keller

“Fear is the Mind Killer.” ~ Frank Herbert, Dune

I’m heart sore. Actually, I’ve felt that way to one degree or another for the last six years. It seems that violence and attacks on human rights have escalated to such a degree that not a day goes by when there aren’t news reports about some new incident. I haven’t really known what I could do to help make a change in our society. I’m just one person after all. But for some reason these last few shootings of people who were just in the wrong place at the wrong time made me realize what’s causing all the upheaval. It’s fear.

We’re swimming in fear and it’s killing us. We carry guns because we’re afraid of others. We start wars because we’re afraid that we’re losing power and prestige. We try to control everything on the outside because we’re afraid to live anywhere but inside the little boxes we’ve made for ourselves. Frank Herbert was right when he wrote in Dune, that fear is the mind killer.

I don’t know about you, but when I’m afraid, my mind whirls and I am unable to make a decision. My brain is on autopilot and I’m not thinking, I’m reacting. However, I’ve been doing lots of personal and spiritual work over these last few years and here’s what I’ve learned. To stop our fear, we need to stop and consider that maybe we’ve been wrong. Maybe the world is not a dangerous place. Maybe it’s friendly. When we break the cycle of feeling fear, we can think of the consequences of our actions and hopefully avert tragedy.

Fear makes us think that we can control every dangerous situation we might face. That’s illogical. We can’t control anything outside ourselves! The only thing we can control are our own thoughts and feelings. But it seems there is a large part of the population that either doesn’t know that, or is unwilling to accept that fact.

Albert Einstein said, “There are two ways to live: you can live as if nothing is a miracle; you can live as if everything is a miracle.” We get to choose. Do you want to suffer, as the quote above by Yoda says? Or do you want to be showered with miracles every day? I choose to experience miracles.

I’m convinced that we feel so much fear because we’ve been told stories about the dangerous world around us. But that’s only half of the story. We hooked our logic, emotions, and free will to a huge lie. There are two sides to the human story. It all depends on where we place our attention. For those who are religious, do your scriptures encourage you to trust in God or not? Trusting God is to declare that we live in a friendly universe and that we have faith that we will receive God’s grace and blessings. 

My first B.A. degree was in religious studies. I was there for the stories about humans interacting with God, or Higher Power if you prefer. And what I remember most were the stories of miracles. The miracles that Moses performed to free the Israelites from slavery in Egypt. The miracle of Sarah conceiving the child Isaac, with Abraham, even though she was past child bearing age. All the miracles that Jesus performed. I believe that there are so many miracles in the scriptures of every single religion, but for some reason many of us choose to ignore those wonderful, heart warming examples. I could go on about all kinds of miracles that have happened in history too, but you get the idea of what I’m advocating. You have to look for miracles, not the danger.

I choose to live a life seeing the good in others and seeking out new and wonderful experiences every day. And because I chose to do that at a young age, I’ve had an amazing life so far. 

What do you choose to experience? Is crushing fear something you want to live with every day?

I reach out to my family, students, podcast guests, and even my social media circle because I want to cultivate positive connections. I write this blog for the same reason. I hope to connect with all of you. Every creative thing I do is because I love hearing the stories of others and sharing them and my own with others. That’s where the miracles happen, in positive human connections.

I pray lots of miracles are happening for you at this time. 

Blessings,

Lucinda Sage-Midgorden © 2023

Saving the World One Story at a Time

The world is in such chaos right now that sometimes we need to get a perspective on what’s happening. I designed this course on Ûdemy for people who are looking for a way to get a better understanding about what it means to be a human being. Stories are one great way to walk in the shoes of the characters, connect with them emotionally and learn from their mistakes. Then taking what you’ve learned and use it out in the real world. It’s learning in a fun way! If that sounds like something you’d be interested in, I hope to see you in class.

The Space Between Time

Lucinda is the author of The Space Between Time, an award finalist in the “Fiction: Fantasy” category of the 2017 Best Book Awards.

Have you ever experienced life shattering events? Yeah, after the last few years, most of us have. In The Space Between Time, Jenna Holden gets slammed by her fiancé walking out, her mother’s untimely death, and losing her job all in one week. But she receives unexpected help when she finds her three-times great-grandmother’s journals and begins the adventure of a lifetime.

The Space Between Time is available in all ebook formats at Smashwords and for Kindle at Amazon, or you can find the ebook at iBooks or Barnes and Noble. If you prefer a physical copy, you can find a print-on-demand version at Amazon. Stay tuned for news when the audiobook version is published.

Lucinda is also the host of Story-Power a podcast where she and her guests discuss their creative endeavors, and/or the stories that have changed their lives. It’s available here on Sage Woman Chronicles and on Apple, Google, and Spotify podcast apps. Please rate and leave a review. It helps people find me.

Story-Power on Patreon

I’m so passionate about stories that I created the Story-Power podcast and Patreon communities so I’d have an excuse to talk story with other story lovers. If you’re passionate about stories too, and want to talk about what you’ve learned from your favorites, come join me at patreon.com/StoryPower.

PodMatch

If you are a podcaster, or have a message or fantastic product you want to share with the world, I encourage you to check out PodMatch. Use the affiliate link and tell them, Lucinda sent you. Then contact me so we can set up a Story-Power chat.

Feeling Two Things at Once

“Participate joyfully in the sorrows of the world. We cannot cure the world of sorrows, but we can choose to live in joy.” ~ Joseph Campbell

“When we quit thinking primarily about ourselves and our own self-preservation, we undergo a truly heroic transformation of consciousness.” ~ Joseph Campbell

We experienced a death in our family early Easter morning. Needless to say all of us who knew her have been deeply affected by this untimely event. I don’t want to give more details than that. But I would venture to say, everyone who reads this understands grief on one level or another.

I’ve felt two ways about grief and loss throughout my life. I don’t know exactly how I developed this point of view, but when a loved one dies, or I’ve lost a job, or the ending of a relationship, I do feel broken hearted. At the same time, there is a part of me that knows something else or something better is coming just over the horizon. My sister reminded me this week of the idea that there is always a gift in a death. 

I do like to look for the gift in any seemingly devastating situation. For one thing life would be so boring if nothing ever changed. Can you imagine going to work everyday and doing exactly the same thing over and over again? They make horror movies about situations like that. Human beings are not robots and as much as we would love to avoid the pain of loss and sorrow, the world is not set up that way. I believe we are meant to deal with the pain rather than stuff or mask it with some substance. Denying grief and pain only makes it grow.

I try to embrace change when I feel it coming if I can. Sometimes bad things happen that are a shock, but even in those kinds of situations, I allow myself to feel the pain and sorrow so they lessen and I can look for the gift.

Most of the time in my family, the death of a loved one brings us all closer together. I feel that’s what will happen this time too. We were all together last summer, now we get to be together again to embrace and remember the good times. 

This death in our family has made me think of events in the wider world. The human race has gone through so much turmoil in recent years. So much hatred, greed, lies, the pandemic, tragic deaths and events have worn us out. Lots of people are shell shocked. When I feel that way it’s hard to see how the human race can change course and make things better.

Everything is in such a tangle. But how do you unravel tangled threads? You loosen the knot, you pull out one strand at a time until eventually, the threads are straight again. Looking for the gift in shocking and tragic situations is kind of like that. I don’t try to untangle all the threads, only the ones I can affect and trust that other people will untangle their own threads.

Another thing I do when I’m feeling overwhelmed is to help someone else, to just be there for them. My paternal grandfather was not well known to me, but I discovered he was a great man. I only met him a couple of time before his untimely death a few months after our summer visit. I was 9. Years later I attended the church sponsored college in Lamoni, Iowa about an hour and half south of Des Moines, where my grandparents lived when he died. At homecoming I met the parent of one of my fellow students. When she heard my name she asked, “Are you related to Jim Sage?” I told her he was my grandfather. “Oh, I have to tell you a story about him,” and she proceeded to tell me about a time when there was a death in her family and my grandfather came to their house, along with many other church members. But unlike the others, he didn’t say much. He just sat silently, weeping and holding them until the initial grief had passed. “That was the best ministry anyone could have given us at that time,” the woman said with tears in her eyes. I had tears in my eyes too. I never forgot that story. Sometimes the best gift we can give is offering empathy and connection to someone who needs it. We benefit by the love and caring that passes from us to them as much as they do.

The events of these past few years have confirmed one thing to me, love is much stronger than the hatred and all the other negative things that humans do that they think will protect them. There is evidence, if you look for it, that a shift in thinking away from the negative toward love and caring for each other is happening. Thank heavens!

I’m just planting seeds here. It’s hard to give up the familiar ways of doing things; the idea that life is hard and then you die. I’m with Joseph Campbell, and so many other teachers of recent years who say that love and joy are our natural states. I believe that to find joy in the sorrow is my purpose here on this planet at this time. So, when the family gathers to honor our lost member, I want to just sit with my family, to cry, and listen to all the great stories about her. It’s weird to say, but that will be a blessed and joyous time.

Welcome new followers. I hope everything in your life is going well. If not, I hope you have a great support system to help you through the rough times.

Blessings,

Lucinda Sage-Midgorden © 2023

The Space Between Time 

Lucinda is the author of The Space Between Time, an award finalist in the “Fiction: Fantasy” category of the 2017 Best Book Awards.

Have you ever experienced life shattering events? Yeah, after the last few years, most of us have. In The Space Between Time, Jenna Holden gets slammed by her fiancé walking out, her mother’s untimely death, and losing her job all in one week. But she receives unexpected help when she finds her three-times great-grandmother’s journals and begins the adventure of a lifetime.

The Space Between Time is available in all ebook formats at Smashwords and for Kindle at Amazon, or you can find the ebook at iBooks or Barnes and Noble. If you prefer a physical copy, you can find a print-on-demand version at Amazon. Stay tuned for news when the audiobook version is published.

Lucinda is also the host of Story-Power a podcast where she and her guests discuss their creative endeavors, and/or the stories that have changed their lives. It’s available here on Sage Woman Chronicles and on Apple, Google, and Spotify podcast apps. Please rate and leave a review. It helps people find me

Story-Power on Patreon

I’m so passionate about stories that I created the Story-Power podcast and Patreon communities so I’d have an excuse to talk story with other story lovers. If you’re passionate about stories too, and want to talk about what you’ve learned from your favorites, come join me at patreon.com/StoryPower.

Saving the World One Story at a Time

The world is in such chaos right now that sometimes we need to get a perspective on what’s happening. I designed this course on Ûdemy for people who are looking for a way to get a better understanding about what it means to be a human being. Stories are one great way to walk in the shoes of the characters, connect with them emotionally and learn from their mistakes. Then taking what you’ve learned and use it out in the real world. It’s learning in a fun way! If that sounds like something you’d be interested in, I hope to see you in class.

PodMatch

If you are a podcaster, or have a message or fantastic product you want to share with the world, I encourage you to check out PodMatch. Use the affiliate link and tell them, Lucinda sent you. Then contact me so we can set up a Story-Power chat.